Browsing Paradise

I have been browsing for hours and hours, really cherishing the fast internet connection at my new place. I started off by just checking my emails. Finally, I can use the standard view instead of the boring html view. The world is such a better place.

Then, I tested more of my luck by checking out my facebook which has been neglected for a long time. Now I can check out all the photos, notes, and profiles as much as I please without having to silently curse at the browser. So you can trust me on being more “sociable” now (what?).

I tested more of my luck again with You Tube. I typed the address and… I rejoiced. Streaming was a breeze. I cruised through the world of internet entertainment without any obstacles. I was surfing in heaven.

This is all thanks to Speedy that was recently installed by the owners of my place. All of us here get to use it FOR FREE. I love that word, “free”. (Laughs)

Anyway, in the end I have been using up my time checking out the videos from my You Tube subscription updates.  I have subscribed to a lot of channels. I have the talented Christina Grimmie, the awesome The Piano Guys, the incredible Lindsey Stirling, and the fascinating Harvard site. I recommend all of these channels to all of you.

After that, I continued my habit of checking out new songs and new artists in the music industry. I found this cool new artist called Kimbra. I checked out one of her songs entittled “Call Me”. It’s really something. Then I cried over some touching Britain’s Got Talent auditions. I really have a soft spot for sad and soppy stories with happy outcomes. If you are something like me, click on the link now.

I don’t remember everything I did on the internet, but I came across the James Morrison song I had been searching for: Undiscovered. I came across that song when I was watching a movie weeks ago. I loved it. I didn’t have a good internet connection at that time, so I asked my friend to look it up for me. He couldn’t find it though, mainly because there have been a lot of downloading sites aren’t so friendly anymore. I got to prove it this evening. All of the sites I had looked up confronted me bluntly about piracy (darn).

However, as usual, I got my way again. At least I got the song, all thanks to the You Tube FLVTO. I looked up the song on You Tube and just converted it to mp3. Piece of cake. If you want a slice of my treat, just click the link directly above.

Anyway, I had a blast tonight, watching videos and sharing them on facebook without haste. I have shared so many links that I may have spammed my friends’ pages. Sorry guys! It’s not my fault my internet connection rocks (laughs). Just kidding.

Good night, everyone!

Menjadi Sesuatu

 

Lihat, aku sedang tumbuh.

Aku sedang berkembang menjadi sesuatu, apapun itu.

Kau bilang itu takdir. Dia bilang itu sesuatu yang harus kutentukan sendiri.

Menurutku itu sesuatu diantara keduanya.

 

Kalian sering menasihati aku agar lebih bijak,

Menancapkan sebatang kayu disampingku, agar aku tumbuh sempurna.

“Karena kita harus berusaha.”

Tapi aku juga seperti ilalang, yang merambat kemana saja,

Bahkan kadang tak sengaja,

Sampai kalian harus memangkas tunas-tunasku,

Agar tak berkembang menjadi “sesuatu”, katamu.

 

Kutahu kalian peduli,

Kalian khawatir aku akan tumbuh menjadi ilalang

Karena aku merambat bukan pada jalur yang telah kau tentukan.

Kadang gerakanku tak wajar, tak biasa.

Namun, sewaktu-waktu, biarkanlah aku seperti itu.

Karena aku sedang tumbuh, berkembang

Menjadi sesuatu.

 

Menjadi

 

Aku.

Encore

“Shit happens.”

“The good only lasts that long.”

“I don’t know why this is happening to me.”

Why does life actually look rather pitiful when these words are said?

Let’s say that when God closes a door He opens two windows or when He closes a window He breaks down a wall or something like that. Or let’s say that stuff happen for a reason and the wheel keeps turning. Or karma is evident and heaven and hell exist (?).

So what if all these quotes, these sayings, are actually true or untrue. So what if there are fanatics and atheists and deists and radicals. Who is right, who is wrong… who has the right to judge?

So what does it prove?

 

difference?

 

Of course not.

 

Maybe it proves that we all believe in something. Anything. And we need it to keep going.

 

Just believe.

Looking Through the Eyes of a Child

Have you ever noticed that expression children have when they uncover an act of kindness, of pure love, of empathy, and of true beauty? It’s their tendency to be subdued by it, as their eyes twinkle with merriment and wonder, and their faces glow with pure joy. Everything they exhibit is raw and real. It is not those thick masks the adults wear frequently to camouflage as an item in society. Nor is it a product of our “cultured” and “cultivated” sense of preference that is too well trained to abide to specific norms. No… Soon, beneath that aging intelligence, we will realize that we cannot see as clearly as we should. Then we’ll know that they hold the power to see everything as it is - untainted and true.

Disconnected

When I write for this blog, it is usually out of impulse, not really out of a carefully structured plan of words. Thus, I write it quickly (don’t wanna let the idea slip) and publish it quickly. That is why I go crazy when the internet connection is messing with me. I can’t cater to the impulses. I don’t get the prospect of publishing anything. So, I don’t write anything at all.

As you can see, I haven’t posted in quite a while. No fashion post. No food post. No story. Nothing. I have been so annoyed by the availability of the network here at my new place. It takes a million years just to load a blog page - I don’t even dream of opening You Tube anymore. Chatting through Gtalk isn’t conveinient at all and I have neglected facebook and twitter altogether because it wastes more time than it usually does with very little achieved.

I rely on the internet for my activities. I write and publish stuff on my blog. I watch entertainment on You Tube. I socialize on facebook and twitter. Yes, if it makes me sound like a secluded introvert, maybe I am. Since I am new here at my new place (duh) I haven’t made too may friends. I don’t hang out often. Plus I don’t have a TV yet (not that I like to watch many things on it). I have to keep in touch with my old friends so I use the internet. It’s cheaper than telephone. It makes sense enough, right? However, now I’ve been disconnected from the network, the world, and my sources of entertainment.

Anyway, If this internet connection trouble persists I have the risk of dying from boredom and lack of social nourishment.

 

Geez… I gotta get a life here.

 

A Flair for Fashion: My Sister’s Debut

My sister Kiky loves taking pictures, posing, smiling – the works. She is also photogenic, which further contributes towards her instinctive ability to make a pretty picture. Therefore, I am granting her indirect wish to promote herself here on my blog.

The other day, we bought some new scarves and other items for Muslimah wear at a store called ABABIL. It is located in Gejayan, Yogyakarta alongside an array of traditional restaurants. At the store, we purchased some items we haven’t tried before like a “ciput ninja” (an accessory worn under the scarf to securely cover the hair) and a pashmina.

We brought them home and experimented. In turns, we tried on the “ciput” and pashmina. We turned and twisted the pashmina in various shapes around our heads but didn’t get any look that could satisfy our tastes. My sister was better off than I was. At least the shape of her head was much more suited for the style. It’s round and kind of heart shaped. As for me, I looked like an oddly misshapen egg (laughs). My face is longer, sort of oval, which rather plagues me when I want to experiment with new styles. That’s why I didn’t try out this new trend sooner.

Anyway, we got fed up with the pashmina. I started to experiment with the scarves we bought. At the store, they call it “kerudung KJP” which looks similar to “kerudung paris”. The difference is in the material. It is thicker and less see-through compared to that of “kerudung paris”.

I chose green and purple to match with some of the outfits I have at home. They cost only Rp10.000 which I think is a reasonably fair and rather cheap price for the scarf. Then again, most of the items at the store were fairly affordable.

So we tried out some new styles by combining the different colored scarves over the black under scarf. Personally, I was inspired by the beautiful Hana Tajima and a new friend I met at the mall recently. I must say, my sister and I are quite happy with the result.

Isn’t it cute? ^-^ We tried to incorporate many different atmospheres or moods into the style. We wanted it to be feminine, fun, creative, and of course modest.

No, I am not opting to make a fashion blog yet. Nor am I confident enough to post pictures of myself (yet, haha) to share the styles. I prefer to utilize my sister. However, I am looking forward to getting creative and showing the results on my blog.

Kindly show us your support by liking this post!

Threads of Thought

Crocheting has become more than a past-time activity for me. It’s therapy. There is just something soothing about knotting, looping, and weaving the threads of wool.

I usually let my mind fall into a reverie of past, present, and future as I am making the patterns. I think about some issues that were or would be and map them out in my head, exactly like how I would map out the patterns and calculations for an item I wanted to make.

Each loop makes a significant contribution towards a pattern. That pattern would turn into a bag, a scarf, or another type of accessory. Sometimes I have to think forwards and backwards at the same time. What would happen if I made this loop here? Or, what pattern would I have to make to make that item?

Then I find myself thinking about things like, what would happen if I said this to Mr. X? Or, would I get that opportunity if I went to Mrs. Y? Most of the time, I would weave the threads of questions into a pattern of possible answers. Occasionally, it would become a knotty mess so I’d have to untangle the thread and start again.

I usually have to deal with a couple of “mess-ups” before I am satisfied with the result. If I am lucky, I don’t have to redo much of the crocheting because I messed-up the loop somewhere near the end. However, it isn’t a rare occasion for me to start again - from the beginning. I’d have to pull the thread and unravel the pattern’s I’ve made right to the very first knot. That’s why it is so important to plan everything ahead and make a satisfying base. I also have to check all the loops and calculations all the time.

It isn’t like writing, where you can type a draft quickly and check it later, when you’re finished. You can’t make edits in specific places, and be free to do it, regardless of the order.

When I am crocheting, every loop and knot and pattern that comes after a single misplaced loop needs to be redone. That mistake has its proportion of punishment. Or else, I don’t do anything about it and live with the unsatisfying display.

I think life is similar in this way. Everything has its consequences. Every action counts and creates the pattern of events in the big picture of life. That is why I have to plan ahead carefully and act accordingly.

Of course there are times when conditions are always changing. Then there’s always the matter of luck versus intuition. Most importantly, I believe in the everlasting presence of a greater being that predetermines and determines things we do not know of.

Thus, sometimes my crocheted scarf incorporates a pattern that differs from that of my original plans. Mainly it’s because I change plans throughout the process as I come across better possibilities or I find it too difficult to manage a certain pattern. Other times, it’s simply beyond my control. It just turned out that way, even though I did everything according to plan.

Sometimes the results are disappointing. However, every success is rewarding enough to cancel out most of the past disappointment and continue to make more items. Plus, I am blessed enough to get surprised with results that are better than anything I had planned.

Either way, when I wrap it up to give it to a friend, I find they always appreciate it, regardless of the way it looks. It’s just a bonus, they say. What matters is the process of all the effort and hard work put into it.

 

I think God regards us in a similar way.

 

***

“God, use me. Use this life. I don’t know what the future holds for me but I know that there is a vision for my life that is greater than my imagination can hold. Use me, use me. What would you have me to do…” (Oprah)

My Mom’s Food Corner: Tofu and Mushroom

It’s been a while since I have made another post for this blog. Thus, the amount of views has been rather neglected and I feel guilty for being a disappointment to any viewers out there who may have been expecting another post (I hope).

Anyway, I will write about more food now. This time, it’s my mom’s dish again, not mine (thank goodness ;p). I forgot what it’s called, exactly (sorry Mom!). I think it’s “Tumis Jamur dan Tahu dengan Saus Tiram”. In English, it’s roughly translated to “Mushroom and Tofu Stir-Fry with Oyster Sauce”.

Mushroom is also one of my favorite food. I think mushrooms have a unique taste; a cross between meat and green vegetables. That’s why I have difficullty sometimes in deciding what I should eat it with. However, I assure you, tofu and mushroom are a great combination. Tofu is kind of strange too, don’t you think? For me it’s a cross between vegies and cake. Laughs.

Anyway, I think Mom has made another masterpiece with this dish. All the unique ingredients mash up into a rich taste of different textures. Accompanied by the thick sauce, and complemented with an assortment of spices, it will create a siesta inside your mouth!

Care to try?

Sebuah Prosa Tentang Jilbab

 

Pada suatu hari aku melihat sehelai kain bebentuk segi empat yang sempurna. Aku melihat perempuan-perempuan membelinya di pasar, melipatnya menjadi segitiga sama sisi, lalu memakainya untuk menutupi rambut mereka. Kemudian orang-orang menyebut mereka “cantik” dan “suci”. Jadilah aku berpikir bahwa kain itu ajaib, seperti gaun dan sepatu kaca Cinderella yang diberikan Ibu Peri agar ia terlihat cantik.

Aku hendak menguji keajaibannya. Kusuruh ibu membelikan kain itu untukku. Yang berwarna putih, kataku. Karena putih itu warna yang paling suci dan bersih, bukan? Sedangkan aku tahu aku tidak putih.

Kukenakan kain putih itu menutupi rambutku, seperti perempuan-perempuan itu, dilengkapi bros cantik berwarna hijau. Hijau itu warna yang melambangkan keimanan, kata mereka. Sedangkan aku tahu aku tidak hijau.

Pada hari Jum’at, hari yang mereka pilih untuk beriman dan bertaqwa*, aku datang dengan penampilanku yang baru. Aku merasa seperti Cinderella. Mereka memujiku “cantik”. Mereka menganggap aku suci dan baik. Terbukti bahwa kain itu memang ajaib. Namun, aku yakin keajaibannya akan pudar jika dipakai terlalu lama. Bukankah sihir Ibu Peri hanya berlaku sampai jam 12 malam? Maka, aku menyimpan kain itu untuk dipakai lagi di lain waktu. Kapan-kapan saja, pikirku.

Hari berikutnya aku mendatangi mereka dengan penampilanku yang biasa. Mereka tidak memuji. Bahkan mereka memarahiku karena menanggalkan sesuatu yang suci. Seolah-olah aku menjadi buruk tanpa perlindungan kain itu.

Keesokan harinya aku kenakan kain itu lagi. Jadilah aku suci kembali, padahal aku masih aku yang biasa. Ada yang tak lazim dengan semua ini, pikirku.

Sejak itu aku tak pernah menanggalkannya. Aku tak pernah luput dari pujian yang lama-lama menjadikan aku tidak nyaman. Sampai suatu saat, aku melakukan kesalahan. Sepetak kain itu sebagai saksi, ketika aku mengotori diri, tersandung sana-sini, dan akhirnya jatuh. Tidak seperti Cinderella, tidak ada Ibu Peri yang menyelamatkan aku.

Mereka berubah, memaki-maki aku dan kain yang menutupi kepalaku. Mereka menyalahkan kain itu, menanggalkan kain-kain diatas kepala mereka sendiri. Itu “tipu daya”, ini “cuci otak”, kata mereka. Tak percaya lagi mereka bahwa kain itu cantik dan suci. Itu topeng belaka, sebuah alat untuk bersembunyi. Hingga mereka tak sudi lagi mencari-cari apa yang menjadi esensi. Yang ada hanya sensasi.

…

Aku masih percaya bahwa sepetak kain yang kumiliki ini ajaib. Kain ini dibeli ibuku seharga dua puluh ribu rupiah di pasar pinggir kota – kain putih dari bahan katun dengan bordir yang manis di ujung-ujungnya. Ada yang menamakannya “kerudung”. Lebih banyak yang menyebutnya sebagai “jilbab”. Ia seperti perisai, yang melindungi tubuhku dari tatapan-tatapan liar di jalanan. Karenanya, orang-orang senantiasa mendoakanku dengan untaian kalimat salam ketika berjumpa denganku.

Yang terpenting, kain ini memberikan aku asupan rasa malu. Aku malu karena telah salah dan keliru. Aku malu jika tak lagi mengikuti malu, tak menepati janji.

Apa yang terjadi bila Cinderella tak segera pergi ketika jam berdenting pukul dua belas malam?

Bukan sensasi yang patut ada. Bukan penilaian pragmatis yang mendahului dan akhirnya menghakimi. Kain ini tak pantas disalahkan atas kekeliruan aku, kamu atau mereka.

Tidak. Sehelai kain ini bukan sihir yang menjadikan aku cantik atau suci. Bukan topeng yang digunakan untuk bersembunyi atau menipu.

Semua kebaikan terletak pada esensi. Sehelai kain ini membantu kita semua menemukan kebenaran yang hakiki…

 

tentang apa itu cantik,

apa itu suci.

 

****

 

“Jika aku berbuat salah, mohon jangan salahkan jilbabku, karena aku yang salah. Sebagaimana kau menganggap bahwa jilbab itu merupakan pakaian yang benar - bukan karena aku yang benar.”

 

*Di daerah aku, hari Jum’at di jadikan sebagain “Hari Imtaq” (hari iman dan taqwa). Sekolahku biasanya mengadakan ceramah umum di lapangan sekolah pada pagi hari sebelum jam masuk kelas.

My Food Corner: A Cheesy Breakfast

Hello and good morning everyone! Wake up and smell the food!

I am going to write about another breakfast meal I made with one of my favorite ingredients: cheese. I love cheese, whether its cheddar, parmesan, mozzarella or even delicate and strong tasting Italian cheese. I wish I could go to Italy someday to pig-out on all the cheese.

Anyway, I was feeling especially “cheesy” today (mind the connotation) that I wanted to make a cheesy meal. Thus, I raided the fridge.

Sausages: check.
Cheese: check
Tomatoes: check

Then I raided the kitchen cabinet.

Bread: check
Chili sauce: check

I could make a mini pizza! I love mini pizza. So, I got some bread and spread chili sauce (I like it spicy, you could use tomato sauce) on one side. Then I chopped the sausages into small pieces and spread them evenly on the bread. I would then usually sprinkle a generous amount of grated cheese on top of it. However, we only had a small block of Kraft cheddar cheese in stock. We had a lot of Bega cheese singles though. Mom had bought the black pepper cheddar type. Because of that, I embarrassed myself that morning.

When I opened the plastic cheese packet and saw the cheese, I gasped out loud. There was mold on the cheese! Little black dots of mold! I was sure that this type of cheese wasn’t supposed to have any fungi on it’s surface. I thought mom had bought expired cheese. So I yelled out to mom: “Mama! Kejunya jamuran!” (which means, “mom, the cheese is moldy!”) However, as mom came rushing in, I saw the packet and it dawned on me. It was supposed to be speckled. It was “black pepper cheese”. Silly me.

I turned to my mom with a sheepish grin on my face. “Hehe… Black pepper-nya, Ma,” I told her. She just smiled and went on with her business. So, I continued with cooking.

I laid one cheese single on top of each slice of bread. Then I sliced the tomato into big, round, pieces and put one slice on top. I put the mini pizzas into the oven for 7-10 minutes at about 200 degrees.

I would always know if it was ready by the sizzling sounds of the cheese melting and boiling. I also like my crusts brown and crispy. That’s why I leave it in the oven a little bit longer sometimes and peek in repeatedly to see whether the crusts were brown enough.

While I was waiting for the pizzas to be ready, I prepared another meal. Dad had cooked some cassava fries earlier and I wanted to eat them for breakfast too – with a little twist. So I grated the small block of cheddar cheese and sprinkled it over some fries. Then, I put it on a tray and into the oven as well.

I usually make more than enough pizzas so that my brothers and sisters could eat it when they wake up later (I usually wake up the earliest in my family). I usually make four pizzas, one for each of us.

When the oven bell rang, I took out the pizza and fries and turned off the oven. Then I put two sizzling hot pizzas (I was greedy today) and some cheesy fries on a plate. Then I poured myself a cup of strawberry juice and dug into my breakfast happily. Alhamdulillah, it made my day!

Try this at home, cheese lovers!